Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Venting

To the Chupid Bus-Driver who cut before my bus-driver and nearly kill off a bus-full of people (including me) yesterday: What the frick you think this is? Dover raceway? Where you get your damned driver's license? And what the hell you think you doing cutting in front a driver going full speed on a two lane traffic-jammed road - just to get to a damned bus-stop for two little passengers? You damn lucky our bus-driver can actually drive, or else you would have bout sixty murder charges on your head now. And you lucky the man that stop our bus and got out to confront you bout your nasty driving never have a gun on him. Him woulda blow your brains to Timbuktu. Is people like you give Jamaica bad name, driving on the road like you get your license underwater! You don't know you can't overtake on main road that ram with traffic? And then for you to look at the bus fulla frighten passengers that just see them life flash before them and laugh? You shudda open your bus door when the angry man come knock it and tell yuh to come outta the b@*b$cl&^t bus to make him and you work it out. Yuh shudda open the bus door and come out mek him get to buss yuh a$$. Eediat!!

To the University Administrator who neglected to update their website: Now you just really need a lick inna yuh head!! You know how much trouble you cause me? I was there believing I had to pay $43,000 plus miscellaneous. Had the money put down too. Now I hearing that things change and I have to pay $150 something-thousand!! You know how much trouble you cause me????? You know the hell me going through now to find that mega-load a money that my parents don't have hiding somewhere cause them not rich people? How you must not update something as crucial as the raises in fees?? Especially by THAT MUCH? Hm? You think money grow on trees round here? You think we have money fallin from sky like rain? Hm? You mek I ever catch you... I beat that 150 gran outta you...

To the guy at work who claims to have this unhelpable attraction to me: Help it!! Because you don't stand a chance in hell and you're getting on my laaast nerve! You make me want to throw my cell phone through the window under a speeding car, disguise myself and go into hiding. For the record, when a girl say she not interested the first coupla times, is not a test to see if you persevere and eventually get the prize - is not some covert invitation to pursue her to the ends of the earth. It should never be a turn-on. Take it that she mean exactly what she say: SHE NOT INTERESTED!!

And furthermore, is just plain chupid and ridiculous to ask a girl you just meet and barely know if you can be her boyfriend - just outta the blue so?? If it was a joke, it would prob'ly pass for a half-compliment, but for you to look her dead in the eyes and be serious... and she don't know you from Eden, and you don't know anything bout her? You MUST be kidding!! The law is that you try to get to know the girl first, then, when you build some sorta attraction, you try a move...

And one more thing, you can't just up and start pursuing a girl without finding out first if she don't have a man! This is Jamaica! You ever hear bout cutlass and bottle torch?? Man will black your eye for them woman... so nex time you feel 'unhelpable attraction' do yourself a favour and check if the chick single FIRST!!

4 comments:

Jdid said...

and breathe lol

all three parties want beating. was going to say one more deserving than the other but naa all a dem wicked and deserve some lashes.

Abeni said...

lol..if is UWI then no surprise! They just plain suck

Gotta luv our Cbean bus drivers

Ruthibelle said...

bway a tell yuh.. i just lucky my parents was saving and never tell me... talk bout eclectic wisdom. And them want beating yes Jdid. Them want nuff nuff beating!

Anonymous said...

LMAO... you're upset, huh? LOL. Calm down, adn like Jdid said, take a breather... lol. THis had me laughing too hard